I was so embarressed

I’ve been looking at this photo for 3 days.  It was taken over 20 years ago when I worked in television.  I’d been sent to Cannes to buy television programming.  Meetings were held in fancy hotels and on yachts.

I can still remember how I felt.  So completely out of my depth, and embarrassed.  Embarrassed to the point of being overwhelmed.

Embarrassed that I wasn’t cool enough, smart enough, television enough. Feeling like the odd one out.

It took me a long time to realise that being the odd one was is a super power.  I was never meant to march to the beat of someone else’s drum.  When I’m true to me I don’t feel embarrassed, it’s only when I try to be someone else.

Today I could finally smile at that young woman and my heart was filled with pride.

She found the gumption to be the star of her own story and left an industry that was sucking her soul dry.  She created a new life doing something she’s really good at - helping other women to find their truth, their courage, and to take their next step.

How far we have travelled, she and I, and I know in my heart that we’re not done yet.