Wild Boar Totem

SHE showed up this morning

In the form of a dead wild boar

Laying across the path where I had intended to walk

Stopped in my tracks, literally.

Catapulted back to nights spent nursing sick pigs willing them to live to draw one more breath

Acutely aware of the duality that at a future point in time that I would be bringing them to slaughter.

But this is not why I sat with them in the wee small hours, singing, praying, cajoling, weaving energy out and spiralling new life back in.

A primal desire to live, them and me

Did I know the incantations for life?

I used to.

 

Breathing in the smells of death and the musk of her wildness

Unwilling to leave her here all by herself

So I left her corpse and took her spirit

Carried it with me back up the mountain, home.

 

Seeing her legs as my legs carrying me forward

I know this stubborn wilfulness so well.

Protection for the softness of the underbelly

Hers lying exposed and open bleeding back into the earth.

 

Is that enough, to return to the mother?

Was it enough to live and to be witnessed by me?

Would it be better if my neighbours had found her

so they could make use of her bones and her sinew and her flesh?

 

SHE totem

Boar totem

Medicine carrier for truth and courage and confrontation

What will I do with this wild spirit called life

That is also a part of me?

 

Image by ravenari.deviantart.com

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